Get Rich Quick Scheme

It's exponentially harder to write in this blog the more I think about who reads it. I feel like people are watching over my shoulder now, and I need to censor myself.  I don't know why but I feel more comfortable on stage when the mic is off. 

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"What do women want?"

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I want to get rich, and I have a plan. I think people will listen to anything you have to say, as long as they want to hear it. People don't listen to things they don't want to hear. I need to find something that everyone wants to hear.  I want to tell the world something. I want to say something everyone wants to hear, but never realized they did. I want to tell a story. The best story in the world. 

Screenplay writing is about finding the constants in people's lives, and exploring them. It's about finding what everyone struggles with. What causes people pain? What makes people laugh? What makes people think about their memories? What makes people remember what they're trying to forget? 

I want to know.

-Ryan

Writing

Of all the coffee shops on Mass St, Starbucks is by far the most air-conditioned. Lately it's the only place I can go outside of my own apartment and not sweat. I'm near the point where I need to either accept that I'm sweaty, or seclude to the idea that nothing ever changes. The point of the nuke was to fix me.

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"Any special powers?"

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There's a lot to think about when you're alive. A lot goes on around you, and you miss most of it.

Sometimes I wish I would wake up one day and I was the only person alive in the world. I'm not sure how I would reach initially, but I know I would be happy. I could do anything I want.

When I was a kid, I would fantasize about the ability to freeze time. Stopping time and experiencing myself free from the world. I would imagine freezing time and walking into an ice cream shop, making myself a sundae, then walking out. Walk into a department store, steal that jacket I always wanted, and walk out.

I think I've always wanted to leave society. Making my own rules, doing everything I can think of. Smashing glass.

Sweating.

I've always wanted a super power.

-Ryan

Friend

I think part of life is faking emotions. We learn to expect what people want from us. We begin to understand how we should act in certain situations. We want to have the right reaction when we need it. We find comfort in finding the right reaction, and express it. But our emotions aren't always behind that reaction. Sometimes we express an emotion because it's right for the situation. We instinctively want to express what those around you want from you. A friend of yours is crying, so you put on a sad face. Your friends are all dancing so you have to start moving.

It can be hard to fake it, especially if you don't want to. And when you don't, you suffer for it. So you have to pretend.

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"I'm sorry to hear that."

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It's genuine to be there for someone. But it's always going to be uncomfortable. You just have to care.

-Ryan